Citizenship - what it means to me

First off, I'm not a citizen of the United States...just a plain ol' Alien Resident, a.k.a. Permanent Resident, a.k.a. Green Card Holder. So I have a unique and enviable position of being able to apply for citizenship. Having a Green Card, some might wonder, "why bother?" It's a difficult decision to make...do I want to become a citizen of the worst global images, when I'm currently a citizen of the country with the best image in the world.

Having lived in the States for the past 6 years, I share the opinion that the political climate needs to change, and I feel the need to express that opinion through a U.S. citizen's right to vote. As a spectator through the last presidential election and having witnessed how George W. Bush has led the country, and feeling completely helpless and useless in not being able to make my vote and opinion count, I feel that applying for citizenship now, when the country needs a boost in its global image and a paradigm shift in its dealings with the rest of the world, is the best time to do it. Besides, after paying U.S. taxes for the past 6 years and not have anything to show for it, I think it's about time it did.

One major factor in my decision is that I wouldn't have to surrender my Canadian citizenship. If that were not the case, I think my feelings toward U.S. citizenship would be different.

Another factor has to do with the requirements for being eligible for citizenship. They're fairly easy if you aren't a complete dumbass or lowlife. I found some sample civics test questions online got some lulz out of them. They certainly made me feel at ease over how incredibly stupid you can be before they give you the rights of a U.S. citizen.

For example:

Q: How many colors are there on the U.S. flag?
Q: What color are the stars on the U.S. flag?
Q: Who is the 1st President of the United States?
Q: Who is the current President of the United States? No, you can no longer use the search term of "miserable failure" on Google to find the answer to this question, but you still can on Yahoo.

Granted these are the simple ones, but it's sure to test the 5th grade knowledge of most people who were actually born in the U.S.

Oh yes, another requirement is that I may actually have to take an english test. Me....take an english test. Me...who came from an English-speaking country where I lived for over 20 years. Heck, I can do the english test in French. I can write and speak english than most natural-born citizens! I'm not bragging, but maybe the fact that I can blog in english should be an equivalent qualification for an exemption from the english test.

Mind you, I had to go through something similar when I had to get my Missouri drivers license. I had been driving for over 10 years in Canada and I had to go through a driver's exam (written and road tests) to get a Missouri license. I mean, we all drive on the same side of the road, the road signs are the same and in the same language (except there are no polar bear crossings in Missouri), the traffic light signals use the same colors, so why the presumption that I can't drive?

I didn't have to go through anything similar in Texas, even though everyone here drives like it's a different country altogether...go figure.